A new kind of goal setting for 2016…

 

When I was learning how to be a leadership coach, my mentor would open our practice sessions with this statement:

This hour is yours. What would make you feel wildly successful to accomplish by the end of our session? What one goal do you want to achieve?

I will ask you the same questions:

This is your year! What would make you feel wildly successful to accomplish by the end of 2016? What is one goal you dream of achieving?

You might say:

Be my healthiest self (Lose 10 pounds and eat my veggies)

Write a book

Get organized

Start a business

Learn to say NO

Use my gym membership

Read the Bible in a year

Volunteer for a charity close to my heart

Cook a recipe a week from my favorite cookbook

Or any of the 30 little things to become a different you from LifeHack blog

These are all good goals. (In fact, many are on my list.) The problem is, these goals may only provide a temporary solution to internal problems that will still be with you January 01, 2017.

Because I truly care about you and your success in 2016, I am going to suggest a new kind of goal setting.

Change begins from within. Change looks at the whole person – spirit, soul, and body. The change you desire will require a personal awareness of your strengths, weaknesses, and motivation. This will be the catalyst to putting your goals into action.

Let me ask you this questions:

How would a time of detox for your soul, spirit, and body change you? How would it change the influence and impact you have on the people you lead, the people you love, and the world at large? Do you crave something different? I know I do. Read on and learn how.

6 Ways to Change Your Life in 2016

FAST FROM PEOPLE PLEASING

Start 2016 by taking a fast from other people’s opinions. Instead of fasting from food, fast from people pleasing and worrying about living up to other’s expectations.  The only person’s approval we should seek is God’s. The good news is, we already have it! We need to quit expecting of man what is only promised and fulfilled by God. Think about the freedom you will feel!

We need to quit expecting of man what is only promised and fulfilled by God.

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God wants to do something extraordinary and extravagant in your life this year. But first, you must believe it and expect it!

Therefore the Lord waits [expectantly] and longs to be gracious to you, And therefore He waits on high to have compassion on you. For the Lord is a God of justice; Blessed (happy, fortunate) are all those who long for Him [since He will never fail them].

Isaiah 30:18 (AMP)

STOP ASSUMING

Do you consider yourself an expert at reading-between-the-lines or knowing what others think? The obsession with knowing what others think is a symptom of a deeper problem. It is time to stop assuming you know what people are thinking.  Ask yourself: What is my motivation for filling in the stories of other people’s lives? Do I need control or their approval? Instead of assuming what others are thinking, choose to honor people at their word and allow God to be the judge of their thoughts and motivation. This simple choice will change your life forever. If you are tired of reading between the lines, read this blog.

FAST FROM COMPARISON

Fast from comparing yourself to others on social media and start comparing yourself to what God says about you. Rarely, does anyone put the raw details of their life on Facebook, Instagram or Pinterest. You don’t read about the fight she had with her husband, or the way he shamed his kids in front of people at the grocery store. You don’t see the picture of her clutter hidden behind closed doors posted on Pinterest. Social media has created a false reality of perfectionism that use to only appear in magazines that host articles about the rich and famous. Today, anyone can be famous and perfect. The New Year is a good time to check and see how you are doing in this area. Be honest. If you find yourself spending too much time on social media, take a break. Fill yourself up with the truth about Whose you are and who you are instead of the persona of others. If you are wondering what the Bible says about comparison read 2 Corinthians 10:12 (TLB). Scripture never holds back the truth.

“Oh, don’t worry, I wouldn’t dare say that I am as wonderful as these other men who tell you how good they are! Their trouble is that they are only comparing themselves with each other and measuring themselves against their own little ideas. What stupidity!”

OUCH!

RUN FROM ADDICTION

Don’t skip this section because you don’t touch drugs or alcohol. Addiction is anything we do over and over again without the ability to stop. Food, alcohol, pain killers, bingeing and purging, sexual addiction, and even shopping can all hold us in patterns of addictive behavior. You cannot manage addiction, you must run from it. Freedom requires action. Tell someone you trust to hold you accountable. Replace the addiction with a healthy chose. Guard your mind. Remember: Whatever you focus on will become bigger in your life. Choose wisely and ask for help.

DETOX FROM SHAME

Dr. Brene’ Brown, researcher of shame and vulnerability says, “Shame is at the root cause of addictive behavior. Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we can change. To shame someone into changing says, you are horrible and worthless and you will never get better.”

There is an important difference between shame and guilt.

Shame: I am bad.

Guilt: I did something bad. I need to correct it and move forward.

When we focus on the action NOT the person we encourage change.

Has shame become the predator of the extraordinary life God wants you to have?

If you think shame may be framing your life, read this blog.

BE FREE FROM WORRY & FEAR

Worry is assuming responsibility for something God is responsible for. A study I read recently showed worry is hard to change because we typically worry about things that will never happen, thus proving to ourselves that our worrying worked!!

Worry cascades into irrational fears.

What are you worried about? Your kids, your marriage, the next terrorist shooting, who will be president?

The Bible clearing directs us to focus on eternity and the work that needs to be done so that ALL will know the love of Christ. If we isolate ourselves in a bunker of worry and fear, Satan celebrates because we are useless to the Kingdom of God. We MUST remember: Regardless of what we see in front of us today, in the end, God wins!

There are so many more pollutants in our lives to consider: Anger, manipulation, unforgiveness, hypocrisy. Personally, I will start by detoxing from people pleasing and fear in 2016. What about you? If you are unsure, spend sometime today asking God to search your heart for what you may be missing. Ask Him to reveal your blind spots so you can have the best 2016 imaginable!

When we attend to the needs of the spirit, soul and body, we will be free to achieve everything God has planned and dreamed for us!

Recommended Reading:

Alicia Britt Chole – 40 days of Decrease (released Jan, 2016)

40 Days will call your community to fast apathy, injustice, resentment, hypocrisy, and more for the love of God.

“Decrease is only holy when its destination is love.” Alicia Britt Chole

Francis Chan – Crazy Love

Does something deep inside your heart long to break free from the status quo? Crazy Love calls you to a radically different relationship with Christ. Once you encounter it, you will never be the same. 

“The greatest knowledge we can ever have is knowing God treasures us.” Francis Chan

Angela Craig – Pivot Leadership: Small Steps…Big Change

You were created for greatness! Pivot Leadership is for every person who want to impact his or her world!

“The theory that something has to be big to have significant impact is false.” Angela Craig